Money Matters
Just a few months ago, a fren asked me to help him gave ang bao on his behalf. That was like in February 08. Till date, he has not returned me the money and definitely dint indicate any intention to do so. I have reminded him once and he reverted that he would return by end of April 08. Well, I havent hear from him since.
The amount is not "heaven-high" figure, and definitely I will not starved because of that amount. He is currently facing some family problems, and I share my sympathy with him.
If I remind him again of the debt, it would appear that I'm a totally cold-hearted animal. Knowing well that he has financial difficulties, and I try to "push" him to a corner for that small amount of money? I scare I would kenak lightning strike lor...
On the flip side, it's totally none of my concern to begin with. It's not my family problem and it's not that I'm getting the ang bao. So why am I being involved in the first place? It's still my hard-earned money, ya know.
But I guess if you compare the damage for both parties, I would suffer less and polly earn a credit for myself. Haha, if somebody up there is keeping track of our credits and sins lor.
But put the amount and his problems aside, I just dun like the fact that the sympathy is taken for granted. I thought that I would appreciate if he has told me straight in the face that he could not return the money and just say thanks to me. I mean, if you make donation to charity, the beneficiaries would show their gratitude to you, dont they?
It's so embarrassing to ask people for the money they own you. It's weird but surely you people feel the same? The lenders will feel embarrassing to ask back their own money coz it would appear that they are niao lah, calculative lah, cold-hearted lah... all sorts of bad names. Whereas the borrowers will appear pitiful and everyone will sympathize with them.
Why is it that the lender will be perceived as the stronger one, and the borrower the weaker one?
To put myself in the borrower's shoe, perhaps to ask people for money is already putting down one's ego. And to tell the lender " Could you just give me the money?" is over the limits?
Well, this entry is meant for all to ponder.. for both potential lenders and borrowers. I guess everything boils down to respect for each other and dun take things for granted. Feel free to share your comments too!
P.S. I dun think I will remind my friend again, haha, unless he read my blog lor =p
The amount is not "heaven-high" figure, and definitely I will not starved because of that amount. He is currently facing some family problems, and I share my sympathy with him.
If I remind him again of the debt, it would appear that I'm a totally cold-hearted animal. Knowing well that he has financial difficulties, and I try to "push" him to a corner for that small amount of money? I scare I would kenak lightning strike lor...
On the flip side, it's totally none of my concern to begin with. It's not my family problem and it's not that I'm getting the ang bao. So why am I being involved in the first place? It's still my hard-earned money, ya know.
But I guess if you compare the damage for both parties, I would suffer less and polly earn a credit for myself. Haha, if somebody up there is keeping track of our credits and sins lor.
But put the amount and his problems aside, I just dun like the fact that the sympathy is taken for granted. I thought that I would appreciate if he has told me straight in the face that he could not return the money and just say thanks to me. I mean, if you make donation to charity, the beneficiaries would show their gratitude to you, dont they?
It's so embarrassing to ask people for the money they own you. It's weird but surely you people feel the same? The lenders will feel embarrassing to ask back their own money coz it would appear that they are niao lah, calculative lah, cold-hearted lah... all sorts of bad names. Whereas the borrowers will appear pitiful and everyone will sympathize with them.
Why is it that the lender will be perceived as the stronger one, and the borrower the weaker one?
To put myself in the borrower's shoe, perhaps to ask people for money is already putting down one's ego. And to tell the lender " Could you just give me the money?" is over the limits?
Well, this entry is meant for all to ponder.. for both potential lenders and borrowers. I guess everything boils down to respect for each other and dun take things for granted. Feel free to share your comments too!
P.S. I dun think I will remind my friend again, haha, unless he read my blog lor =p
2 comments:
well..there is a chinese saying ''tan chien shang gan ching'' i know my chinese is bad..haha..anyhow ur fren is nt gentlemen also, throw him aside then.i mean he borrow $$ never return means forever not return it? althought is a small sum but it reflect his attitude, haha..unless u wana donate the $$ to him.cos he already hinted u..he gt family problem..
I paiseh to ask back leh.. SobZZ..
Anyway, there is a chinese saying " You Jie You Huan, Zhai Jie Bu Nan". In this case, definitely no second time liao lor..
Haiz... Next time dun lend $$ to anyone liao! Yes! I'm hinting to everyone, friends or not friends, rem dun borrow $$ from me! =p
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